Lesson 48: A kick from behind…

Life sometimes wallops us on the back side.

Target Concept by ponsulakHave you ever found that? Actually more often than not you are just amiably piloting your way through the maze of your life and with no warning you get a fat slap on your rear end that sends you careening through the hedge to the other side of who knows where.

There you sit – aching seat side,totally confused and bewildered. I have to actually chuckle because a few years ago I thought that was just totally not on. How dare we get a butt whacking when we are seeking after everlasting happiness … the nerve of it.

Here is the kicker though – and not in the butt or maybe that is exactly what it is – Β life is not about finding happiness.


Say what? Can that be true – after all these years if us searching with such vigour and passion to find the dreamlike status of true happiness we now find it was a journey began in complete ignorance and prodigality.

All our lives this has been our intent goal. All that which we have hoped to achieve has been solely based on one end result and that is happiness…

Getting the promotion; finding our spouse; producing a gaggle of children; becoming a world-famous pie eater; having our name published in the Times magazine; discovering the missing sock you lost the last week in the dryer; buying the new Ferrari or for some a Fiat; living in the house of your dreams or at least moving out from your parents place; losing 10 pounds and never finding it again and the list goes on.

But.. and I hate starting a sentence with but – but seen as though we are discussing the butt end of our issues here it may be apt – happiness is not actually what we were designed to run after. You see happiness is fleeting – in this world we all know that well.

One moment you could get the promotion and the next you realise with the promotion comes a lot of sleepless nights, hair loss and bad breath. That promotion may result in an increased bank balance but ultimately it does not lead to sheer happiness at all – it is more than likely responsible for the depletion thereof.

So what is it that we should be hoping for and working towards in this life that will bring us the peace we so covet?

In a nutshell


Consider the difference between a moment of happiness and the eternity that comes with fulfillment.

When you feel fulfilled in something there is very little that can remove that from you.

So lets say you get the promotion and yes it’s tough and you feel like you are operating more out of a caffeine and donut induced energy that sleep but you are able to make a considerable difference in someone’s life or the economy of several lives – you would sit back fulfilled.

A feeling of being full – in your spirit – not your belly.

Not something quick and temporary but something lasting – something meaningful and remarkable.

The wallop on the backside we should expect – and yes, they are really tough to deal with at the best of times but it is these moments and times in our life – when we face the kicker – when we grow with it that we can get to a place of fulfillment.

Like I was saying to my son just the other day when he was asking me why things had to be so challenging in life –

“We don’t grow when things are cosy and comfortable. We have to get uncomfortable to be pushed into growth. Then when we are through those moments we can look back and appreciate the challenge. This is perspective – we don’t have it until we are through it to look back. Only then can we visibly see the growth and the value of the trials.”

Finding fulfillment is a far greater mission than seeking happiness – one that will bring perspective, growth and a depth to us as human beings that is far more remarkable than fleeting happiness.

Think on that for a moment and grab your life with both hands – there are so many remarkable things left for you to do and discover …

To find that fulfillment.

Soit en paix,(be at peace)


Image courtesy of ponsulak at FreeDigitalPhotos.net


  1. Ahhh, so very true Mich. As usual you have nailed it. I have had this same discussion with everyone from the neighbor to academics – all insisting it is happiness that we seek- and I disagree, it is for sure fulfillment. Many of the best decisions I have made in life have been to choose challenge and difficulty that resulted in fulfillment. I would never have made those decisions if happiness had been the basic criteria. Here’s an example I posted a while back https://cordeliasmomstill.com/2014/11/06/serendipity-guest-post-by-paul-curran/

    Excellent post, as usual Mich. It is odd that I was thinking about you just a few minutes ago and “Pop!” there you were in my in-box. You are magical. πŸ˜€

    1. Thank you so much Paul! You are such a positive encouraging man and I so appreciate your comments.
      I wish I had got this some time back but I know it is all about your own revelation that brings wisdom with age and maturity. Imagine if we gathered these pearls early on in our life! Wow.
      Thank you for the link I will be sure to read that one!
      Bless you indeed!

  2. As a friend once said to me, ‘ As soon as you know, you grow. Growing is sometimes hard to recognize in its early footsteps.’~D.O.
    Lovely write Mich.

    1. Thank you so much Meredith. I so appreciate that!
      Yes, happiness is fleeting – here for only a moment at a time and it leaves us feeling so despondent when we just can’t seem to get a grasp on it.

      Here is to your fulfillment and mine! πŸ™‚

  3. Lovely to see you back again Mich…I missed you! And I would say that contentment in all things, no matter our circumstances, truly is the key to living life as we should. Easy to do? Heck no. Happiness is a myth I’ve come to learn because it is so fleeting. Yet without the pain how would be know how to really live in the joy? I think too of that old saying: ‘Be careful what you wish for; you might just get it’. Ha! So true, so very, very true. Big hugs to you my ‘old’ friend…one day at time, we’ll get there πŸ™‚ ~ Sherri xoxo

    1. Thank you for your lovely comment Sherri – it is so good to be chatting to you again. You really are an inspirational woman in my book and your words are too true. How would we know without the pain – how would we value the goodness without the arduous journey of getting there.
      One day at a time and value every one of those steps indeed!
      Mich xoxo

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